Make My Mind Stop! – 4 Suggestions

Make My Mind Stop! – 4 Suggestions


When your mind is racing and all you want to do is to make it stop, what do you do?

There are so many suggestions out there from the holistic aromatherapy approach, to the go to the gym and sweat your batoody off, to writing in a journal.  Many entrepreneurs, especially the stay at home mom kind, have their brain hardwired to think all day long.  It never shuts off.  When you lay your head down at night thats what it is the worst.

I can understand this more than anyone, my mind goes a mile a minute, especially at night when I want it to shut off.

What bills do I need to pay?

What am I going to cook for dinner?

What affiliate programs can I join?

How can I get more people for my portfolio?

What books should I read to help others?

Am I even going to succeed at this?

This right here is when the spinout of thoughts turns negative.  Self talk is so essential to an entrepreneur, so anyone really.  If you continually talk negatively then that is what will remain in your life.

In the book, “Mindset Magic: Using Scientific & Spiritual Principles to Create Your Life” it states “that if you claim something (think something) and claim it to be true your subconscious mind or amygdala will accept and bring forth into your experiences.”  So basically, what this book is saying that there is scientific proof that you can bring into existence peace, calmness, and all things positive is we just BREAK THE BROKEN RECORD OF DOUBT AND NEGATIVITY IN OUR BRAINS.

What is the reason we always go to the negative?

Some will say that it is because we had some type of experience in our earlier lifetime that has created this negative aspect about ourselves or a situation and it just keeps repeating until something happens where that chain is broken.

For me, I have a lot of experiences in my lifetime that has created the Negative Nancy tape in my head, but as an entrepreneur I am most guilty of comparing myself to others.

Why can’t I just look like her?

When I look like her or sound like her I will make more money.

My business doesn’t look like hers so thats why I am not making money.

I need to look prettier, skinnier…..and the list goes on, and on, and on……..and on.


Society today looks at the exterior, your skins, your hair, your nails, you clothes, what your driving, where you live, as depicted in this image by Meg Gaiger from Harpy Images. If you do not fit in societies cookie cutter mold or what “the Jone’s” dictate as what’s in then your not part of it, your labeled, your an outcast.

The fact of the matter is, it all comes down to one thing….HOW WE FEEL ABOUT OURSELF.

What? What the heck does that mean?

My feelings are controlled by my thoughts and when my thoughts are negative then my feelings will be negative.  It is basically the proverbial chicken and the egg at that point.  When I feel I am not up to someones or myself’s standards my thoughts will find that negative tape and play it over and over.  On the other hand, when I am feeling confident, loved, on top of the world, worthy my mind will play the positive tape.

I know this has to be confusing, am I making any sense?

So, the key to stopping that negativity in your head will come down to what you want to do to help yourself.  Here are a few suggestions that will help when the Negativity Monster comes after you:

  1.  Come up with some positive mantras.    I am beautiful. I am worthy.  I am going to be the success I know I am going to be.  I am loved.   Remember, get your subconscious to understand it is true and forever change the tape and your life.

  2. Meditate or Breathing Exercises.   Mediation helps with relaxation, clearing your mind, and pulling you back into the present moment.  Being present in the moment is important because when we are over thinking or having a racing mind it is due to either looking towards the past, which is full of regret, or the future which is full of fear. 

  3. Soak in a Hot Bath.    ****this is my favorite method****  This is not something that is a medical explanation here, it is simply one of my personal methods to helping calm my mind.  Running a hot bath, maybe some bubbles, a good book or some candles and just zone out.  This is also a great time to combine mediation with this method.

  4. Journalling.  Writing what your thinking and what your feeling is so important on finding out the real, striped down thinking is all about.  Do not hold back, by raw, be real, be authentic in your writing so that way you can either look back and laugh, look back and realize you have had this issue before and it is creating a pattern, or look back and see how far you have come.

  5. Gratitude Lists.   Thinking of something positive will hopefully make you see and think of ho amazing your life really is.  

  6. Sleep!

There is so many other methods out there.  I can spend days and days listing them all.  Most people, actually 1 in 5 people have anxiety and depression, which can be tied to a chemical imbalance, but can also be tied to experiences that a person has gone through or is going through.  So, spending the time to uncover what is really going on will help you get through to the other side.

The mind, our thoughts are all an amazing thing.  Just like our bodies we need to take care of it.


Parenting…Isn’t there a Manual?

Parenting…Isn’t there a Manual?

As a mom of a 4 year old and a 11 year old I sometimes wonder if I am doing this parenting thing right.  I think that is a question we all wonder as parents at one point in time or another.  I have been doing a lot of reading on parenting to make sure I provide the best childhood for my children.  There are so many different paths, techniques, and choices to make.

Lets give you some background:  My son lives with his father, which I would not trade for the world.  Is there guilt there? Absolutely.  I might not get to be there everyday living 3-7 hours away, but I know that where he is has to be the best for him.  I see him as much as I can see him.  With that being said, my daughter who is 4 lives with me.  I have sole custody of her and try to make the best decisions for her.  My fiancé works for the pipeline, so my daughter and I travel with him.

My thought processes on this is that she has a strong, consistent male role model in her life, we live similar to the military life, and she gets to see different areas that she might not have living in one area.  There are a huge number of critics about this life and having a child on the road with us, but in the end…there really isn’t a book on this parenting thing.

The environment that I am creating for my children is an environment where they are able to come to me, no matter what is going on, and talk to me about it.  I can remember being able to go to my mom about losing my virginity and I can remember talking to my dad about the drugs I use to do.  Having that trust was paramount on being able to know who to come to and who to trust.

Creating that trust and honestly starts at a young age.  The mind of a child is shaped by their surroundings until they are 7 years of age before they start to shape their own thoughts and feelings about what is going on around them.  How to create an atmosphere of honesty and trust means not always doing what is thought to be done.  Yelling, punishments, and corporal punishments aren’t always the answer.

Do I belive in spanking my daughter? Yes, when she deserves it.  Do I believe in sending her to the corner or taking a toy away? Absolutely, consequences for actions need to happen.  Do I yell too much? I certainly think so.  I am human and get overly frustrated, reached my limit, or just plain crazy when kids do not listen.

There is a different way to go about all of this.  Let your kids know that it is ok to tell you anything, regardless if it is bad or makes them uncomfortable.  Those are natural feelings that kids need to experience and you, as a parent, need to nurture.

One of the biggest take away’s I have learned so far as a parent is:  DO NOT SWEAT THE SMALL STUFF.

If you continuously yell, create a mountain out of a molehill, or always punish for every little thing then your child will wash it out as white noise and either chose not to listen to it, hide, lie, or sneak around so they do not have to hear the “white noise.”

Let’s be selfish for a moment, all this yelling and screaming, punishing, stressing, and everything that a parent does, what is it actually doing to you?  It is creating more stress in your life, it is playing a role on your health and mental well being.

The fact of the matter is that when a child is being raised in a house where love, trust, honesty, and reasonable consequences are given we are raising a child that will understand how to talk to adults, respect, and not fear authority.

Do I wish there was a manual? No way.  Life is too interesting, children are so priceless.  They are sponges and they take everything to heart, so be compassionate, show love in more productive ways then yelling.  Just because your parents did it doesn’t make it right, the world evolves and children think differently then when we were kids.  So we need to adapt.  We need to provide a better life then what we were given.